"The Nerve Agents" or "S/T" Carpe Diem I've spent 27 years, chasing dream after dream. Some attained, some remain, So I'll keep on in that direction. Don't try to hold me back, or route me to another track. These dreams are what I live for. Not slaving to retire. SEIZE THE DAY Paychecks are your bliss, to me that's sick and twisted. Your thoughts are of regret, all day long you are depressed. My drive in life comes from the fear of mediocrity. Not slaving with the herd, running blind and aimless. SEIZE THE DAY Unblossomed There is so much in you, so much more. Than anyone will ever know. A life unblossomed. Frozen, stranded in the snow. IS THIS YOUR DESTINY? You would jump that boat, to bigger things. You would but you lack the courage to lose sight of the shore. IS THIS YOUR DESTINY? Is this your destiny? Will you lose sight of your dreams? Root yourself here and waste away. Is this your... is it your... YOUR DESTINY! The War's Not Over (for Tia) Belittle our lives, make us feel small. Toy with your strength, now we are hitting the walls. Stand over your victims. Are you happier now? How does it feel... to take your family down? THE WAR'S NOT OVER I try to protect her, I haven't a chance here. I'm only fifteen. Now I'm the victim. Are you happier now? How does it feel... to take your family down? THE WAR'S NOT OVER! I'll never... forget... what you have done!!! The war's not over... no!... NEVER!!! Level 4 Outbreak (Inspired by Richard Preston's The Hot Zone) Ebola Zaire, Ebola Reston, Ebola Sudan. The switchblade sisters and their Marburg friend. You think AIDS is bad, just wait until these agents land. An unimaginable nightmare that you can't comprehend.  ARE YOU READY TO DIE? The Ebola virus hidden in some lonely, some lonely man. Sicker than hell, he boards a plane in Sudan. The virus jumps to fresh new hosts, the virus spreads and distributes. Level 4 outbreak, are we ready? ARE YOU READY TO DIE? The virus will kill every organ inside of you. Your blood will gush from every opening on you. Brain Dead, from you no response. You're a bloody mess, your systems crash. Level 4 outbreak, are we really ready? ARE YOU READY TO DIE? Share The Pain (for Brian Wentrup) Always here for you! It's obvious your symptoms, you try to hide. I'd like to help you man, but from you all I get are lies. REMEMBER... WE SHARE... THE PAIN!!! Don't you ever forget! You're running on empty, you are the punishing kind. Can't seem to pull it together? How much longer before it takes you under!? REMEMBER... WE SHARE... THE PAIN!!!! AND DON'T YOU EVER FORGET!!! I'M ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU! You've always been secret about your dark appetites. But you know that I'm here man, so don't be afraid to open up REMEMBER... WE SHARE... THE PAIN... ALWAYS!!! Starting Point I'm sorry that I'm the one here now to tell you. This planet's fuse is lit, it's like a bomb. I heard once, world peace... it can't be done. I thought about it, and now I'm writing this song. PEACE BEGINS FROM WITHIN Make peace in your mind... It's time to live! Hate breeds hate, it will never end, just look around you. But it's not where it ends, that's where you begin. Make peace with yourself, within your world. We are not here to be depressed, we are here to live! PEACE BEGINS FROM WITHIN Make peace in your mind... it's time to live!  It all starts with you!!! Black Sheep Can you look into their eyes now that you've talked shit about them, lied about them. Are you willing to pay the price BLACK SHEEP... BLACK SHEEP... BLACK SHEEP... It's come back around... now you're going down!  BLACK SHEEP... BLACK SHEEP... BLACK SHEEP... I Keep Screaming Life can be cruel sometimes. We know it, we've felt it, it plays with our minds. There is no perfection it's safe to say. But is there room in your mind for change? I know there is and I see you there, and if it's only you it's all still worth my time! I SEE YOU SCREAMING... SO I KEEP SCREAMING!!! I'm not perfect and I'll never be. These words I scream, they're just my beliefs. Somewhere in my heart I feel. I'm not alone, and that this is valuable time. I open my mind to expand my growth and if you're doing the same, then it's all still worth my time! I SEE YOU SCREAMING... SO I KEEP SCREAMING!!! In a world so distraught with chaos and hate. We scamble for answers to ease the pain. It's a rough road to travel. This life that we were given, but we are out there together, and together we are screaming! TOGETHER WE ARE SCREAMING!!! "Split" with Kill Your Idols Planet Frankenstein Life constructed by life. What is your point? That you have a brilliant mind? Needless, destructive, experiments with your modern day Colin Clive. In fear of Planet Frankenstein. It's alive! Super humans, the perfected people. The rejects, where will they be shelved? It's lots of fun to watch on the t.v. but years from now where will it all be? In fear of Planet Frankenstein. Dead Man Walking The sun is going down on you my friend. I look around to see you. The self destructive entity. Embodied in self pity and hate. All that's left for now is to suffocate. All I see of you now is a dead man walking. Death lurks inside of you now, dead man walking. To the pills and needle you have bowed, dead man walking. I'll say goodbye to you now, dead man walking. Make no mistake, you chose the route. Stole from your friends, lied your way around. All you were, long gone, no more. Just a junkie stands, with a hollow core. Don't you dare ever think, that this song is here to glorify your sickness. It's for those with futures. Suffragette City Originally by David Bowie The Way it Should Be Comp. Bitter Seed Hater of men, oh, bitter seed. That chip on your shoulder has got you locked in purgatory. As dreary a fate, as that may be you hold it in your heart, to let go, and break free... Let go!  Weigh your choices, but I don't need you. You see beauty surrounds me, and unlike you I see wonderful characters, strangers, friends, in the people around me... Let go!  You're a time bomb ticking, and you don't know why! Fury's face... does not become you. Arie's ways... are you untold, in you. Unleash your heart... suffocating inside of you. Let down your guard to the beauty that is surrounding you! ...Let go! Days of the White Owl Fall Of the All American Washed up tough buck into a foreign world. Stole your culture, ridiculed. But you showed them didn't you? A physical wonder, that they pedestaled. Smashed their records, they worshiped you. Hero, hero we love you. And you grew, until they pulled it out from you. Yes the body, it caught up with you. All alone, what to do? Digging ditches, play on through. In a white man's world, who are you? Just a memory. Just a memory. The hero shines and the real man dies.  Just a memory. Just a memory. The hero shines and the real man has died. Fall of the All American. Well, we loved you. Prey Here I am living, in this dying world. I take another breath in, with another bill. A slave to the system, I'd like to say no. But who am I kidding, it's an ugly world. So I prey on what happiness, I can get. Live. I will live. I will live. Days Of the White Owl The skies, swirl in a marble haze. I gaze across the land, with a sense of loss. Are we down in the game, do we give in? Wave the white flag frantically. No, no, no. Where do we go now? The corporate nightmare, sprouts like weeds as we ignore, oh so conveniently. Like a coloring book, this land we color in, with chains of stores and homes and businesses. What have we done? No, no, no. Where do we go now? The white owl glides across the summer sun. Death lurks near, I fear for this kingdom. Abused, raped, and ignored. Left to rot by the wicked sins that we cherish as progress forward. I witness, this self destruction of our race. I fear the future, and it's shaping face. I can't help but dwell, on our spiral down. What does it mean for myself, our race, and the future that we own? No, no, no. Where do we go now? Portland Temperatures rising. Sapping all the life from once thriving energies. Fearing failure. Cause of the scheme to run from our enemy. Let's look at the factors. Draw upon our excuses. In the negative minefield. The mind convinced, it's time to run. Runaway from the enemy, you run. But isn't the enemy you? You see, you run. It's back again, because you never adjusted yourself. And now, you are in new surroundings with all of the same old shit, you know. After years of this madness it's starting to make sense but life, is so hard. Yeah, life is hard and that you have learned. Holding on to your beliefs is noble but we are faced with reality. Sometimes, to reach that mountain top we must learn to bleed. So now we revisit the factors. Draw upon all that we dream of. Put aside that old, ill mind. And now we breathe. Off Comes the Blindfolds The truth stands before you. So cold that you don't touch it. The justifications dealt, masking the pain you run from. Oh, and it hurts so. Where did the love go? Kids in blindfolds at play, you wake up now to the unknown. Once love, in youth so innocent. Tough love, now when the world is bent. In love, that is the missing but what's love? You should save your breath. The joy, it haunts you, it all but wrecks you. Knowing the truth and your impending loss. It you love real. Your Warning You've give in, you've accepted. Learned to embrace the rut, the confines in which you exist. You've all but given up. Listen to me now my friend. I'm giving you, your warning. I fear for you now. That's why i've issued you, your warning. I want to see you rise to your fullest, not cower and die. Live your life, like you own it. Because there is only so much time. Time is ticking away. It is all inside of your head. Time to tap into the living. Drop that zombie front my friend. I know you have got it in you. Your warning. Jekyl & Hyde In the darkness of the shadows lurks another side of me. Pieces you don't want to see. You gouge out your eyes in attempt to hold me high. I am your fear. I'm impurity. You scream sellout, and so it goes. How is that you could ever know me? You are not my friend. You only see a part of me. You don't know me. I am Jekyl. I am Hyde. And you cry for, I am reality. You don't want to see me. I'm not your assumption. Next In Line Can you see the fires burning bright? Just look into our eyes. We're out here and we are coming up on you fast. Dare, you try and look away. Ignore us, we won't go away. We are those who will steal the day, from you and your ignorance. We are the next in line. So you've niched your little place, you thought it was all about you. Sorry you won't get the last laugh.  We are challenging your minds, erasing idiotic rules. The walls you've built are coming down, now. We are the next in line. We're creeping up on you. We are the next in line. The Invincible (Dedicated to Rachel) Life's horrors won't sink us. Ignorant words don't phase us. If there is a chink in the armor we hammer it out, and grow stronger from it. Sacred love will find a way. The invincible. Sometimes I feel as if I won't survive.  Numb and lost in this dreadful life. But then she's there  Oh, she's there. She breathes life into me. We thrust our love out into the dark clouds. And when the sun breaks through we've stood our ground, true love abound. Sacred love fill find a way. The invincible. Dead Man Walking The sun is going down on you my friend. I look around to see you. The self destructive entity. Embodied in self pity and hate. All that's left for now is to suffocate. All I see of you now is a dead man walking. Death lurks inside of you now, dead man walking. To the pills and needle you have bowed, dead man walking. I'll say goodbye to you now, dead man walking. Make no mistake, you chose the route. Stole from your friends, lied your way around. All you were, long gone, no more. Just a junkie stands, with a hollow core. Don't you dare ever think, that this song is here to glorify your sickness. It's for those with futures. Out On The Farm 1, 2, 3, 4. You've got your hand in torture. 5, 6, 7, 8. How does it make you feel? The mind slips, slips, slip, slipping into the darkness. It is lifeless.  The air is thin here and grim here. Drugged up, caged up, piles on inhumane. Insane, so insane. Out on the farm, no happy songs. No happy songs, just torture. Devoid of feeling. Who, you or them. A Sad History Shackled to greatness. It's for your best interests. Nothing less but the best my dear. Dragged down this road. Of status by fools. There has been sickness at play, I fear. It's all been mapped out for you. Since you were a twinkle in their eyes. Unfortunately, my dear, this is for them. Your thoughts, disregarded as petty and childish. Shut your mouth, cause your life is planned. A sad history. I will walk my own direction. Following my heart, seeing where it takes me. Strike your match, light your candle. For each and every day of your life that you don't see me. Don't burn down the house, waiting for me. Just A Visual All of you wants, that pretty picture. The perfection, that illusion has got your head. Strive, strive, strive, but the image eludes your reality. On your deathbed, empty handed, it might all sink in. And as you tune out. It hits you. It was just a visual. And then it hits you. It was just a visual. Evil Originally by 45 Grave "The Butterfly Collection" The Poisoning Swimming... quickly in your sea of standards. Drowning, never truly living at all. Beauty surrounds you, but you gun for paradise none the less. With your blinders on so clueless to it all. In the end, can you truly say that you lived... or not? Poisoned the mind... by years of all the lies. Materialistic... society of the blind. The poisoning... it is sickening, all the lies! Your heart gives... from stress... and you fall... you worked your life to death! Tragic you see... your death and its irony. Buried, blind... in the planet that you declined. Myths and lies... the poisoning of our minds. Brainwashed. I'm not buying it! Crisis Crisis today. Oh hell, not again. Lord show me mercy. My heart is rupturing. A flash of death. The hot knife rips... through all inside me. I pray that there will be another night. There is silence... is it time? There is silence... NO! Darkness breaks through. War Against! I speak now of the merciless unseen. An invisible force feeds, malevolent. It's locked up inside me. I will never be free from this disease... it won't get the best of me! Aaggghhhh! My addiction, my intervention! Focus, re-focus! Easily said onto paper. This is my life... and I want it... yes! Sometimes I stumble. But I choose to fight, because my other option is death. Your spirit stands... aided by sticks and poles... fragile... responsible, for your own sobriety. You topple... everyone goes down with you. War against! Let me go. The Vice Of Mrs. Grossly Hey Mrs. Grossly... mistaken. You old and weathered fallen angel. How is it that you came to be here? Irresistibility played you... made you a fool. Hey Mrs. Grossly... mistaken. Now shackled and chained to the rather deranged. How is it that he loves you? Hitting the floor... slammed into the door... face to his fist... he must be hard to resist. Resist! Hey Mrs. Grossly... resist! Madam Butterfly It was not my decision, to conjure up mirrored images that we share... you and me, my dear. Feet firmly planted in the same hell. Interesting though how this plays out. Madam, I remember you now... that was you that stood right out... what was it though, about you?... Oh, I know!... Oh no! When your cocoon breaks, you'll fly away. What then will your intentions be, with your beautiful wings spread, displayed? Madam, embrace your true brilliance! And fly... fly, fly, fly! Madam Butterfly, seek out your true brilliance... let no one ever stop you! Princess Jasmine Of Tinseltown There was no false perspective here. She was so very sad and sickened. In the name of art she was to be here. Dying like all of the others? Nauseated, Jasmine stood her ground while all of the tinsel people, soulless and evil, worked the town. Tinseltown damned. Said she was a princess now in need of conversation. She wanted more from those, that never gave jubilation, when rubbed so slightly. Now here we go, back below... into this metropolitan hell hole. It is not the talent that let's you live... it is the ugliest of things. What Then? How much longer... can we keep up? Before we run out of weapons, to fight the plagues to come? For every virus, we seem to have a pill to pop. But what then, what then, what then...  when the virus, acclimates to all we've got? Will we keep up? And if not... what then... what then... what then? In our defense, are we creating... aiding... an evolution of some super virus... poised to wipe us out? A spear to the animal, that threatens us? Or just... fucking insanity... is this all just insanity. Domination, control we seek... or survival instincts? What am I supposed to think? Well what? The Legend Of H. Gane Ciro They whispered his name again and again. Listen to the tone like a Hollywood persona, an image so big don't you know... the legend of H. Gane Ciro. Feared by all... feared by all. Stories of violence those images burned my mind. A psychotic peer so close, but unapproachable. This was the godfather in my world. The legend of... H. Gane Ciro. It was a different place, a different state of mind, I had now climbed into an acquaintance role. I saw a different side. A family side, a humor side, his struggles of life realities. Knife cutting through the human being of... H. Gane Ciro. I will remember you. But I Might Die Tonight Originally by Islam Yusuf Metal Pig When will I know that it is gone? Life sucked away... is it when the wheels go whizzing off like spinning tops, violently whirling, violently turning till they drop? I've spent the days unsure, but should I spend them prepping for long goodbyes, and teary eyes or flip the coin and revitalize? Have patience until November... so I'm told I need answers! I'm trusting who? Metal pig. New Jersey The Garden State. It rains there every time... except once though. The heart of all hardcore is right there at your door. New Jersey. Never a fade out. You've always been there. What gives? I can't escape you. I really must thank you for all of this. Thank you.(x1000) So, Very Avoidable The blood... red... flowing, a lifeless draining two dead, one on the way. How is that for control? Irresponsible! You paid with their lives in full. With your good friends dead, tell me how will you live? Stained walls, a dark memory, of the night that you did... drive drunk... in control? You were not! When you crashed into the pole. So, very avoidable! But your friends are dead now, you see your friends all dead now, in the early wakeing hours... dripping with sweat. Oh, Ghost Of Mine I hear you dancing upstairs. Moves, as swift as Astaire. I would like to embrace you but, I'm not in your afterlife. Oh, ghost of mine! You haunt these walls. Forever calling... moaning. Is there something unsettled? Were, wounds left wide open to rot? When you died so many years ago, miserable. When you died so many years ago. Were, your wounds left wide open? I'm sorry I have no schooling to sew them shut for you. I'm sorry... oh, ghost of mine. Frost Awake to the morning frost. Retract from the day. I feel no hope here. Hideaway. The fallout remains. Tuck me away. Throw me away. End me today. Our trek to the light may encounter darkness. Grinning it suffocates, annihilates, we fall from prior spinning. Slow to get up? Dare you let the frost settle upon you. It's a cold hard world out there. Don't end... begin! Summon your strength from the hell that's been cast on you. Hopelessness clutches and twists your soul. You will succumb if you let it get to you. It's a cold hard world out there. Don't end... begin! Summon your strength from the hell that's been cast on you! ...can you? When it has you... when it has you... can you summon the strength? Begin!